10 weeks

Yep thats right baby number two is well on its way. I am due May 13, 2012. We are very excited for our new addition to our family. We are hoping for a girl but we will be happy either way. So far the baby is about 2 inches tall kicks and swims around all day it has all ten fingers and toes.

It breathes in and out once in a while, even without air.

Its skin is getting thicker and harder to see through.

The baby often prefers moving one hand more than the other.

If I am a boy, I am now making testosterone just like dad.

It loves roll over and can even do flips!

My joints are a lot like my parent's joints.

It already has more than 4,000 body parts—just 500 more to go! 

It's hair is starting to grow on its brow and near my mouth.

My Crazy Life...

So much time has passed and all I can think is where did the summer go? I mean really.... It's September already. All I can think is I am so not ready for the journey ahead. Going to school and being a mom is a tough job. All  I know is I know its possible. I feel like I am starting over at the starting line and this is just a new race. May looks so insanely far away. Can I really do another 30 credits? That would be just enough to make it through and graduate with my associates. On top of everything I still have at least another 3 years of school. So far my favorite class is photography. Its becoming more of like an expensive obsession. I find myself stopping off to the side of the road taking pictures of a sunset or flipping on my camera to take a picture of ryker sleeping with my pajamma pants (he thinks they are a soft blanket.) I miss being home with my bubba and being able to take him to the park and play with bubbles any time I please. Is this school thing really for me? Do I really want to not be home and just work my life away? I keep running these questions through my mind and all I can come up with is what if something happens to Trent and I have to be able to support my family? Its a scary thought but in all honesty its the truth. I know all you can think is blah, blah, blah.... nI have had nightmare after nightmare for the last couple of months and I cannot get them to go away. It's starting to give me anxiety.

On the plus side I have gone down two pant sizes just from playing volleyball again and walking across campus. I have also lost a few "friends" over drama. I have became a more educated person. I have also learned so much about myself and what I can handle. I love how my life has turned out. I honestly wouldn't change the craziness for anything.

Blood is thicker than water.

I hate the dreams where you wake up and you are crying your eyes out. I had one of those types of dreams... No matter how many times I woke up, and then went back to sleep it would just start back right where it left off. I had a dream that I lost my sister. She had just turned 16 got her car and everything, she was in a store parking lot and got in a car accident. In my dream I cried for like 6 days straight. Everytime I imagined my life without her by my side I couldn't stop crying. It just made me realize that even though we have our fights and arguements she is still one of my best friends in the entire world. I honestly don't think I could live my life without her in it. She has always been there for me to talk to, and whenever I have a bad day she is one of the first people I ever talk to. I love her, and I honestly hope she knows I really do. I love all my brothers and my sisters. I really do. Even after all the fights, and thru all the hard times family is going to be the only ones there. Blood is thicker than water. I know my family will always have my back. I have some of the best family I could ever ask for, and I don't know what I would do without them. I love you guys. (ps im sorry to my in laws because I don't have any recent pictures of them to post, but we still love you guys) <3

Courteney and Ryker

 Ryker

Trevor

Chans

My momma and Ryker

Courteney and Krysten

Bryce, Uncle Tim, and Eric

Bryce

Markie and Ry

Ry and Oz

Jax

My dad

Trent being silly.

 Cam

 Grandpa and Ry

 Auntie and Ry

 Kayla, Jencie, and Trevor

Long car rides



Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Snack time finally :) We had a lot of fun at the DSC football game.

Don't Blink

31 Weeks (right before I had Ryker)

Ryker at 2 weeks old

Me and Trent when we were dating

So far today my apartment looks like a tornado has completely torn through it. No matter how many times I ask them to keep the toys in the other room, it never seems to work. At one point Ryker spilt cereal all over the table as Cam ran around saying chocolate milk. The life of a mom is not the easiest. I know at the end of the day nothing that has happened today will really matter as long as I have hair left and he is safe. Some days I wish life could be a little bit easier although then I know that it would not be as rewarding in the end.

I have been searching through old photographs lately and remembering the times when Ryker was in the hospital. The days where we lived day to day not sure if he was even going to live past living in the hospital. Looking back those 12 weeks seemed like an eternity yet so much more time has passed now. He is already 2 years old. We are switched him from a crib to a toddler bed. It is amazing to me how much time has really passed. The time we spent in Washington seems like another life time ago, and things were so complex. I wish time would slow down a little bit for me to breath, and we can all enjoy each others company before its too late. Don't Blink.

Love Ash

Another day gone....

As summer passes faster and faster all I can think about is how excited I am for classes to begin all over again. I am taking an awesome digital photography class, a whole bunch of major classes, and of course I am taking a volleyball class to help me get back into shape. I think about all the time so far that I have gotten to spend with Mr. Ryker, and I honestly wouldn't trade it for the world. I love being a stay at home mommy, and if I could make a living off of it I would have a ton of babies and live my life like this all day everyday. Trent lost his job, and then thanks to my mom and her awesome connections he had an even better one in no time. Which is helping our family excel faster than I thought we could. We have been looking into fixing up the Jeep ( new paint job and all), and I have been not so depressed. This is very good. I have been excercising and watching what I eat. Its hard being home, but I am needed here more than anything right now. Right now life has been like a rollercoaster, but it seems to be getting a bit better with time. I just hope things keep going the way they are right now because more disappointment would be hard to except. We can only be stretched so far... I cannot help but think about all the time that has already passed, and I want it back. Ryker is 2 before we know it he will be in pre-school and I will be done with school. Where does the time go?

Grandpa Great and Ryker went on a walk.

He goes down the slide all by himself now.

When it was time to go he didn't want to leave.

He's growing up way too fast.

I cannot believe our Ryker is already 2 years old.

Got to love that smile.

Ryker picked a flower and gave it to Grandma Great.

Walkin' like a stud.

Beautiful St. George, Ut.

The hubby lookin at the river.

Watching daddy play.

Looking at the stream and the frogs.

I love being with Trent as much as I can so we all went to the park. Getting out of the house can be really nice. Pinic, pictures, and having fun on the the playground.